Going through your stuff, you ever find that composition book with page after page of really pretentious and really bad stuff that you wrote when you were Much Younger and so incredibly full of yourself that you should have been taken out behind the shed and beaten senseless?
Insomnia – irritating beyond belief.
Demo for Lego Pirates of the Caribbean – way coolacious.
Finding composition book and actually reading that shit – nauseating.
So, it’s fuck near 3:30, I’ve taken ‘make me dumb’ & ‘help me breathe’ drugs and I’m about to try that whole sleeping thing again.
One thing I did find, not mine originally which explains why it’s not shit…
“The Neolithic Ethic”
“You stay in your village and we will stay in ours. If your sheep come to eat our grass, we will kill you. We may kill you anyway if we are in need of your grass for our sheep. Anybody who tries to make us change our ways is a witch, and we will kill them. Stay out of our village.”
It amazes me sometimes how little we’ve evolved.
okay, three hours of sleep later, i’m back – think of it as a scene from pretty much any version of ‘Frankenstein’… “uuuuunnnnnnnnhhh…” – either that or a mental version of Elsa Lancaster’s scream. (I need to watch that again sometime soon – “Bride of Frankenstein” remains one of my all time faves…)
Back to that whole issue that started this post… what do you do when you find crap like that, stuff so atrocious that even if the world was offering you truly obscene amounts of money for anything you’d ever written, you’d never let them see the light of day? I mean, they’re archival – they help define for me a time and place and headspace I don’t remember all that well (we were doing a lot of drugs in those days) so i’m rather loathe to destroy them, but by the same token, i’d really like to forget these pieces… not what they represent so much as the awful, bottom-of-a-septic-tank excrement that they are, as far as writing goes.
Anyone… anyone… Bueller?
Listening to: Lay Lady Lay – Ministry
Mood: surprisingly upbeat, given the abortion that last night was…